A recent work

[MoonWhite]

For my own game as one of the painting in the intro animation. Although my stuffs are always very crude but I'm fond of them. What do you feel for this one?

[dogfood]

I like the contrast between the medication (which look good) and the nice, sunny day (which just looks OK). Unfortunately, the body doesn't read very well. It doesn't really look like you drew it prior to putting the gown on it and there is also a distinct lack of weight. If you hunch the back and shoulders and tilt the head a bit, the emotion would quadruple. In addition to a figure reference, the fabric also needs to have better reference. I can't tell what's going on under the sheets (which is usually of intense interest to me) and there are no realistic effects on the gown.
The perspective of the bed is really off, as well. We are seeing far too much of the top in comparison to how far below the eye line it is sitting.

This certainly isn't bad, but with some attention to detail (in select spots), it could really shine.

[MoonWhite]

Thanks a lot for the comments. You are straight and correct. That's exactly what I need, something that push me forward. The only thing I did with reference is the medication, and that's probably the reason why the rest sucked. It seems I'll have to make up my homework first.

[dogfood]

That's just it: the rest of it doesn't suck. You just need to pay greater attention to some of the different aspects.

I think that despite most of the focal area being scrunched really far into one remote area of the image, the compostion balances fairly well. That's not suckage. The low contrast on the body does create a disconnect between it and the higher contrast elements around it though. But that still doesn't mean it sucks.

OK, that cloud may suck, but only a very little, and mostly just around the edges.

[Pixeldragoon]

I like the "form" of the cloud, I think, as dogfood said, it just needs to be sharpened a little bit. (The edges). I think you might also try to do something with the open sky that leads to the cloud, maybe a far off flock of birds? Because the openness kinda traps me up there with nothing to lead me on. Maybe have something (birds) lead to the buildings, then the buildings would guide the eye as they do now. Just a suggestion though!

I would say do other stuff like add a few windowlines to the buidlings and things like that, but I'm not sure if that would throw off the focus. Also, I think it looks balanced, because the detail in the medication is practically opposite the detail in the clouds.


I almost forgot- I REALLY like this piece, the simplicity- and the way you pulled off the cloud is beautiful and believable, all in all, I like it!

[Tigermilk]

Am I the only one or is this like a total rip off from Ghost in the Shell? hehe
I any case a nice pic, I would put a little more detail in to the buildings tho.
keep it bouncing.

t

[MoonWhite]

Here's the changes I did this morning. Put in some referenced clouds, birds and cloth for the boy. I feel I see this image for too long, I probably lost my sensibilty of the whole picture.