As I've explored deeper and deeper into art, I've realized I have many flaws that need remedied. I just recently was accepted into the Art Institute of Pittsburgh for Game Art & Design and instead of starting this Summer, I chose October. The reason I chose October was to spend the entire Summer tuning my skills and getting ready for the school. I have no idea how the school will be and I'm damn scared about it.
Since September, I believe, I've been working diligently on figure drawing. I've purchased and read books, expanded my horizons on different mediums and have drawn like a son of a bitch only to find that without a reference, I can't draw the human figure for shit! This has been the biggest let-down for me yet because though I can see almost perfectly as an artist, I cannot see from within my imagination let alone the human figure. What do you suggest I do to remedy this problem? Are manikins any good for this situation? I have a cheap little one I picked up for $5 but I have yet to use it. I imagine its purpose is for proportions, right?
Well, another flaw of mine is I lack expression in my art as well as the ability to step into the abstract world. I feel like I've learned a great deal about art in the few months I've been heavily studying it but haven't had the courage to make something non-representational especially since abstraction's main life is animated through color.
So basically I'm just fearing a lot of things. One would be lack of knowledge about color, another the fear of wasting time, another a fear of wasting art materials and so forth mainly because I don't get money too often. To keep my creativity the first priority, I've stayed out of the workplace. Though I know I will eventually get a miserable job that I know I'll hate, I'm pushing that the furthest into the future as possible.
I dunno, it's 6 in the morning and I can't bring myself to draw or anything out of fear of losing motivation and displeasing myself. Though I could shock myself by drawing from a reference, that's not my goal anymore.