The border - feedback appriciated

**TeoM** · February 20th, 2012, 01:01 PM

This is a concept for a school exercise - I'm going to make this into a 3d scene later.
I've been playing around *a lot* with the curves for the different layers while making this, but something still doesn't look just right. I've been staring myself blind at this, so if anyone can point out what areas I should try to improve on, it would be greatly appreciated!

**Lee14k** · February 22nd, 2012, 09:54 PM

I think it looks very nicely done; loving the painted, soft look it has.

The black form is what is throwing me off though...it just doesn't look like its in place at all. I would get rid of it and see how it looks. Or maybe change it...? My eye went right to that. I'd personally would rather observe and see the detailed buildings and structures rather than basically be seeing that in the corner of my eye. I ont knowif that was compulsory or not, to add that in, but I personally don't like it.

I don't know. I'm slightly thrown off as well. Just try to change and play around with things.

**TeoM** · February 23rd, 2012, 11:59 AM

I'm taking the liberty to *bump* this, as it took four days to get approved and by then it appeared at the bottom of the page

Again, any comments welcome!

**JeffX99** · February 23rd, 2012, 02:25 PM

Resize it so we see the entire image without scrolling.

**Giacomo** · February 23rd, 2012, 02:51 PM

Looks fine to me. My only critique is that the forms feel arbitrary rather than functional--i.e., those posts with the banners attached don't seem to serve and useful architectural or structural purpose.

Also, you should install a railing along the left side of the walkway so people do not fall over the edge.

**Max Challie** · February 28th, 2012, 04:38 PM

I agree with Giacomo, form follows function. Nice background though, you seem pretty well accustomed to clouds and light. What's the focal point? I'm torn between the figure and the walkway. Perspective is off in many areas (always keep vanishing points in mind), but it's especially noticeable on that ceiling in the upper right - should that be there? Think about the emotion of shapes/objects and their presence - do you want a sense of openness/clear space or the more foreboding feeling of an overhang?

peace yo