Crits needed... ><

[nettachan]

Hey~ I'm new around here... but I'd like to also submit my sketches around here,
Here's one of my sketches... I want crits before I add colour on it this picture so I know where I can fix and how I can fix it... I personally have this problem with drawing her right hand.... i don't know how to fix it....?

[Elwell]

I personally have this problem with drawing her right hand.... i don't know how to fix it....?

Reference and/or a mirror. There are two main problems: First, her thumb is too small and is coming from too high up, so it looks like a finger, and secondly, you're missing all the subtle opposing curves in the contour of the arm, wrist, and hand that will give it grace.
Other than the hands it's lovely, if a bit derivative.
One more thing; I don't know about dA, but here we allow all sorts of punctuation, besides ellipses.

[kaber]

Hmm...well I think the breasts need work. They're too lumped together and I think the one closest is smaller than the one on the right. She appears to have an unsetteling bulge in her pants but that could be just decoration design.

[Tydal]

her left eye is bulging a little to, just need to tone it down a tad

[Sidharth Chaturvedi]

Other than the aforementioned problems with her breasts and right hand, it looks like her neck would need to be really short for the pose to work. As already stated above, try the pose in a mirror or get someone to model it for you.

Its a nice drawing otherwise and certainly has charm to it. I do think the hatching on the pants works against it, given the line quality on the rest, particularly her top, so you might try sometime else to give it more depth. The cellphone charm is at an odd angle- unless she were moving and causing it to swing, I'd imagine it would hang straight down. Good work otherwise.

[nettachan]

Reference and/or a mirror. There are two main problems: First, her thumb is too small and is coming from too high up, so it looks like a finger, and secondly, you're missing all the subtle opposing curves in the contour of the arm, wrist, and hand that will give it grace.
Other than the hands it's lovely, if a bit derivative.
One more thing; I don't know about dA, but here we allow all sorts of punctuation, besides ellipses.

Thanks for the advice. opposing curves? Can you elaborate? I don't really get that...

and what does ellipses mean? My English isn't all that great sorry...

[nettachan]

Other than the aforementioned problems with her breasts and right hand, it looks like her neck would need to be really short for the pose to work. As already stated above, try the pose in a mirror or get someone to model it for you.

Its a nice drawing otherwise and certainly has charm to it. I do think the hatching on the pants works against it, given the line quality on the rest, particularly her top, so you might try sometime else to give it more depth. The cellphone charm is at an odd angle- unless she were moving and causing it to swing, I'd imagine it would hang straight down. Good work otherwise.

Yeah she's moving it to cause it to swing.
What do you mean by the line quality? I personally think the line quality is pretty bad compared to what you all can make...

How do I actually get the face without the eye looking a bit bulgy? From my eyes, I can't really identify what's wrong... My artwork eyes don't work with me...

[Elwell]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ellipsis:

Ellipsis (plural ellipses; from Greek ἔλλειψις 'omission') in printing and writing refers to the row of three full stops (... or . . . ) or asterisks (* * * ) indicating an intentional omission. This punctuation mark is also called a suspension point, points of ellipsis, periods of ellipsis, or colloquially, dot-dot-dot. An ellipsis is sometimes used to indicate a pause in speech, an unfinished thought or, at the end of a sentence, a trailing off into silence

[nettachan]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ellipsis:

Okay. I'm sorry.
I didn't mean to. It was more of a natural thing I do.

[Elwell]

How do I actually get the face without the eye looking a bit bulgy? From my eyes, I can't really identify what's wrong... My artwork eyes don't work with me...

Flip the image horizontally, all will become clear.

[Sidharth Chaturvedi]

Well, by line quality I mean that for the most part your lines work for the image (although I'm not fond of the virtual outlining of the whole picture - try to vary the lines more to suggest depth and weight). On her top, you have the lines for folds and such wrapping around in roughly the right manner, which shows that she has some shape and isn't... well, completely flat. The pants don't have any such modeling, and need work.

Coming back to the cellphone charm, I'm not getting any sense of movement, which is why I couldn't pick up that she was supposed to be swinging. The way you have her posed, it seems like her upper body is swinging towards the right around her waist, but her lower body would be swinging in the opposite direction for the charm to be doing what it's doing, which doesn't really make much sense.

[P.F.£orin]

I think that the hand shouldn't be that long and big compared to the small fingers she has. It should look something like this??:

[nettachan]

Thank you so much for that edit there!
I'm so sorry my reply was so delayed. My apologies.

A general question - what do you mean by suggesting depth and weight on lines? Like, softer coloured lines and heavier coloured lines?

Also, how exactly do I make the character actually look alive and in movement?

[cupidsart]

I really want to add where others haven't but I can't. This work is really solid, just a few tweaks in the hands and eye.

The way I try and add motion to my lines is almost like treating them like calligraphy, I wish I could go into depth more but my lines still need a lot of work.

Can't wait to see the finished,