Brainwashed about painting...

[AlstonA]

Alright, I’m at a breaking point. I honestly don’t know what to do here. I constantly come home and try to paint. It’s been like this since I was a senior in highschool. I am now a sophomore in college and I still can’t paint. I’ve tried pointless times only to get my work looking like this:


I constantly come home and try painting; and I always fail at it. It's to a point now where I'm missing homework in my college classes. I'm going to school for programming and I spend more time trying to learn to paint. I can't help it I really want to learn how to do it. I've read countless books on it, One of them was Color and Light: A guide for the realistic painter by James Gurney and I still don't understand how to paint.

I've used programs like Paint Tool Sai, Photoshop, and Corel painter 12 and I have even gotten a Intuos 4 small tablet. I've labeled it down to feeling comfortable using paint tool sai and photoshop. I try to adjust my settings as I paint to get my colors to blend well. I've focused more on trying to also prevent myself from overblending or try to make sure my colors would work with the painting; But, it always come out looking like this:


I find myself leaning more to livestreams' now, which in turn puts me in a state of euphoria. I see the wonderful paintings the artist make and I immediately feel like I know what I'm doing. I get delighted until I get to painting myself. Anxiety begins to hit me in the head and everything I once knew about painting disperses from my mind and I am left guessing where everything should go. I really feel I should give up, but it's not that easy. I hate myself because I can't do it. My days have now consisted of me searching for tutorials, Saving artwork, watching streams, or constantly asking for help from people who will not help with painting as I dig a deep hole of depression.

I need help, but I don't know exactly where to turn too. I'm 21 and I don't have the ability to afford life drawing classes or take on art as a second major. Even if I did, I wouldn't know where to find it in the location I am currently at. I'm just not satisfied with my sub-par work. I also know that to mold a great artist it takes time, but I need assistance to help me with my work.

I constantly view an artist named Alien on the internet. I also constantly ask for assistance from the artist from South Korea on Facebook. Even-though there is a language barrier, he is still able to help me to some degree and I am very honored-- but I feel that I need more assistance to help me with my work. I would sacrifice anything in the world just to learn how to paint...

I'm tired of turning in work that looks like this:

[Shorinji_Knight]

Start with learning how to draw. You're painting is much better than your underlining drawings. That is the source of your unhappiness. If the foundation isn't right everything else will look wrong. You don't need to take a life drawing class. Just go out into life and draw. Practice is the greatest teacher.

[tobbA]

I don't have the ability to afford life drawing classes

They're completely free. Just go to the nearest park bench and draw whatever comes in your way.

[JeffX99]

First...you need to learn how to draw. Then you need to realize you aren't painting, you're coloring with a fancy etch-a-sketch. Point being you still don't understand how to paint because you aren't painting. No book will ever teach you how to do something if you don't do the thing itself.

You're obsessing over this and it doesn't sound healthy. Relax. What's the rush? It isn't a race and it definitely isn't a competition if you're just doing it for yourself. Where and why are you "turning in work"?

It sounds like you need to take a break from all of this worry and do some self-analysis. Gain some perspective and try to understand your goals and motivations.

Most importantly I suggest a break from the internet. Life drawing classes are not expensive and almost any community has them. If you're going to college they have them there as well. For now forget a bout painting, definitely forget about digital meadia and focus on simple, basic drawing fundamentals. You've spent a lot of time driving yourself in teh wrong direction, take a breath, turn around and head down a new path.

[vineris]

Well the first thing you need to do is go back to drawing, probably with a pencil, and learn how to draw well by studying anatomy, proportion and perspective. It looks like you tried to jump over some steps, you never learned the basics or developed your observation skills, and now it's biting you in the ass hard. Painting is about representing light on a complex 3D form. How can you expect to paint when you don't understand the 3D form you are drawing well enough to get it right?

Grab a pencil and paper, get some simple 3D shapes like cubes and cones, shine a light on them from various directions and practice shading them. Pay attention to what you are seeing, it's no good if you just do it automatically without thinking. Move up to more complex objects. Learn how to build complex objects out of simple ones. If you can't go to life-drawing classes, that's okay. You can still draw from life, for free. Your house is full of objects. Between still life, self-portraits, getting friends to pose for you occasionally and studying the basics, you can improve your understanding of the 3D form, and then you can use that knowledge on photos to help you out with people.

[AvP]

What all the above have said. Learn how to do this:




then draw lots from life. Once competent then paint with real paint! Only then go back to the digital gizmos.

[TinyBird]

My days have now consisted of me searching for tutorials, Saving artwork, watching streams, or constantly asking for help from people who will not help with painting as I dig a deep hole of depression.

I think some of that time could be used to updating your Sketchbook too.

[Leonor]

What others said plus draw/ paint as you watch the tutorial videos?

[Star Eater]

What others said plus draw/ paint as you watch the tutorial videos?

Never been able to do that. Maybe it's because I'm male, but I can't give proper attention to 2 things at once.
I can have a movie on in the background or music, but its just because I like the noise, I take nothing in from
a tutorial video unless I set time aside to watch it.

[Arshes Nei]

Well...congrats, you have learned to copy anime symbolism and put it on paper. The problem is it isn't teaching you all the foundations you need to learn how to draw. You're basically mimicking without understanding. Hyung Tae Kim has that nifty blush style...let's copy that...but...well you didn't learn anything but to mimick him but none of the foundations behind it. http://heysawbones.deviantart.com/gallery/#/d2t0eyn

Well the next problem "I can't afford life drawing" well it's not just about people but objects around you as well. Go get an apple, go get a simple object, get a good lamp, pillowcase/sheet and draw it.

And the other problem. Obsessing without taking breaks and understanding ...not helping. Truth is Art Takes Time.

[Mrianna]

Also, maybe if you really need to do some art for yourself and add colour, try a different medium from digital? You might find it easier to work with and not so aggravating. It may also help you learn to make things look a certain way when you get back to digital. Just have fun with it all while you are doing it.