I dont know how much time you have or if you can ask for an extension but Heyriel and everyone he mentioned is right, try to follow their advice a little bit more closely. I would also like to point out that you have made HUGE improvements from your first drawing and it does look much better. I feel she still has a manly body, you would want to make her curvier more appealing the face a bit off still, maybe fixing the eyes. At least for the sake of Star Eater and the rest of us have it perching on something, put a rock or a piece of wood in its talons so it isnt just hovering. The position of its wings makes it look like it is trying to land- here is an image to kind of get what I believe we are trying to emphasize to you. The idea that the bird shouldnt be hovering
Hope this Helps!
A Cartoonist is just a lazy Animator.