Ugh. Just doesn't look right.

**gfxtwin** · September 27th, 2011, 01:54 AM

I need some harsh, but fair crits because I just ain't feelin this at all. Can't figure out what all the issues are exactly though, (aside from wonky legs) or where to go about correcting them:

**AboutaDirk** · September 27th, 2011, 02:04 AM

Newbie here, so take it as you will:

Definition.

I think it lacks it a little bit. It's a very blocky, solid figure. No bulging muscles that alter it's silhouette, where it looks like it *should* have some.

Just a thought

**AboutaDirk** · September 27th, 2011, 02:10 AM

Here's a bit of "liquifying" in Photoshop, to show what I mean

As always, this comes with my usual "I'm a newbie too" disclaimer and I expect anyone to tell me I'm totally wrong at any one moment lol

.edit: for instance, I screwed up the leg on the left (his right leg) near the hip :p too bulky

**Greggers** · September 27th, 2011, 02:13 AM

I'm pretty positive 90% of what's wrong with this is in his pose, and should relatively easy fixes for you.
[I'm exhausted atm, please excuse any incomplete thoughts/rambling.]

I'm not getting a very good feel for how he's carrying his center of gravity, his head being slightly cocked to the side looks unnatural, and I'm not really getting a sense of depth on his ribcage. The angles I'm seeing his shoulder pads at and the angle of his shoulder girdle in aren't matching up.

I guess the piece looks like a bunch of details stacked onto each other without forming a coherent whole, if that makes any sense. It's not a problem with the rendering or the proportions, or really any of the technical aspects, there's just something that feels unnatural about the intangible qualities of the piece.

**gfxtwin** · September 27th, 2011, 02:20 AM

Thanks, Dirk!

Greg: Would turning the front foot on the right more so that it's pointed at the viewer help a bit?

**Greggers** · September 27th, 2011, 02:42 AM

Originally Posted by gfxtwin

Greg: Would turning the front foot on the right more so that it's pointed at the viewer help a bit?

I actually put together a really ugly and probably not so helpful paint over to sort of illustrate what I meant.
(I really need to get to bed. I'm falling asleep at the keyboard here. I'll do a more thorough writeup in the morning.)

**arenhaus** · September 27th, 2011, 03:23 AM

The main issue is form. It looks flat, not a 3-dimensional object in space.

The remedy is perspective. Learn to build formal perspective, and use it to "anchor" the figure in space before you add anything like anatomy or skin detail.

**manlybrian** · September 27th, 2011, 04:51 AM

If his proportions are supposed to match a human's then his biceps are too short.

**Elwell** · September 27th, 2011, 09:11 AM

Who is he? What does he do? To/with who? And where? Answer those questions about your character and a lot of your problems about how to approach things will be solved. Because right now he just looks like a random collection of "cool" elements. And this doesn't mean that you necessarily have to change anything about the design, but that if you really knew who he was you could draw him more convincingly. Because you're not feeling it, nobody else will, and all the anatomy etc. tips in the world won't help with that.

**Greggers** · September 27th, 2011, 01:21 PM

Originally Posted by Elwell

Who is he? What does he do? To/with who? And where? Answer those questions about your character and a lot of your problems about how to approach things will be solved. Because right now he just looks like a random collection of "cool" elements. And this doesn't mean that you necessarily have to change anything about the design, but that you really knew who he was you could draw him more convincingly. Because you're not feeling it, nobody else will, and all the anatomy etc. tips in the world won't help with that.

I came back to write up a more detailed critique, but Elwell's got it nailed. It's lacking the intangible qualities that make an illustration fun to look at. Even if you don't spell it out for us literally in the piece, having a purpose and story sort of percolating in the back of your head while painting goes a long way. You gotta, like, be the character man.