Logo Design for Contest (Feedback please!)

[Temiree]

Hey guys,

I'm not really experienced with logo design, but I took a shot at a design for a senior center here in town for a contest. I chose to do a silhouette of a bird, a crane to be exact, because I felt that personified independence and well-being and was a good recognizable shape.

I would love to get better, so feedback and critiques are absolutely welcomed! =) Thank you!

Self Critique: Perhaps the bird could have a more recognizable silhouette. It seems on the edge of being a smudge, or could it be okay the way it is? Hmm...

[OmenSpirits]

I'd see how the circle in the BG would look off to the right, with a little of the beak braking the circle. Could give it more balance because right now everything is focused to the left. Nothing makes the eye follow down towards the important info (at the bottom).

Just my 2 yen.

[nonameowns]

it's kinda hard to recognize that as a bird. Try redesigning that?

[mus]

For when i see this I dont find the logo flowing in together, the circle is separate with no relation to the bird, ending up no link to the name of the center. is it compulsion to add 55+ center to the logo? can it be detached and placed else where?
The three lines at the bottom again tell a different story and are not part of the logo.
I would suggest to first refine the symbol, then add the text to it and you would also want to play a lot with the type face.
Also the bird cut of at the neck doesn't seem to be an appropriate thing to do, its to sharp down their. I think try the the same shape but convert it into some sort of line work, this way you might be able to add some details in the bird(with lines) and also and eye. This should be a good starting point.
Also the color will play an important role unless the current used are official?

[Stuart DeViva]

it's kinda hard to recognize that as a bird. Try redesigning that?

Ignore this. The bird is fine lol.

[Temiree]

Indeed the 55+ was a necessary part of it from what I understood, and the colors that were shown are the official colors they were using to brand themselves.

Thanks Omen, NoNameOwns, Mus and UmpaArt for your feedback and critiques! Even though the contest deadline has passed I'm considering going back to this for the sake of adding it to my portfolio. I'll be sure to keep all responses in mind when I do, and possibly post a new version.

Cheers everyone!

[Fanjoy]

Ignore this. The bird is fine lol.

If one person doesn't understand the logo, then it means that others will misinterpret it as well. Its a designer's job to communicate, and if someone doesn't understand what you're throwing out, something needs to be worked on.

[Grace]

Hey Temiree,

This is a great start. Logo design can be a real challenge. I agree with Mus that it seems like it is cut off at the neck awkwardly, but this can be simple to fix. One thing that I would recommend, which is common practice for a lot of designers, is to go back and try a bunch of sketches or derivations of your design. It is tempting to go with the first idea, and sometimes the first idea is the best... but sometimes another answer pops up through the process of letting the mind roam free, which turns out to be better.

For example, would it be better to show the whole crane? Would freedom and independence be shown better as a crane in flight (with the circle representing the sun)? Is there a different line quality that would work better (e.g. rough ink) or a different style of representation (ex. showing more detail (realistic) or making it more stylized in the linework)? Does the first one logo idea work, but just needs the front of the line extended down into a curve to indicated the chest of the bird, so that you get the feeling that the whole is there, it just hasn't been outlined?

Sometimes a little image research on Google can be helpful to find styles or poses for the crane that really get across that idea of independence and also speak towards the age group that you are looking at (55+). You are on a good track, since your logo looks like a cohesive whole (for some people it is hard to get the image and text to look like they are part of the same design). So now you are at a point where playing with the idea some more can really help you to nail it.

I have found the following tutorial to be helpful because he shows a lot of his sketches and process:
http://www.ideabook.com/tutorials/lo...step_logo.html
Here are some other odds and ends that might be useful:
http://sixrevisions.com/graphics-des...and-resources/

Keep going! I look forward to where you will take this

[MotionWind]

For one thing, kill the circle it's unnecessary, anything that cuts the main text in a logo has to go. Bird needs a redesign, the reason for this it that you used a zoom in design for it. That makes it hard to relate to as a bird, of course you eventually relate to it, but I agree with Fanjoy, a logo needs to be efficient above all.
If by chance you have a design with a cut edge you must never let that show (ex: bottom of current bird design) kill it with lines or with other elements, never let it fly off.

A black and white logo would work best in this case, something simple, you have a lot of text in it, there's no sense in overloading. A simple silhouette would suffice, keeping the lines if you wish. As for the text, try a more discrete font. The lines themselves should be centered since you don't have a element to take advantage of the vertical line they make while being aligned to the left.

Good luck!