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Thread: WIP - Critique greatly appreciated

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    Pepperwheel's Avatar
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    Smile WIP - Critique greatly appreciated

    hi I've been having trouble finishing paintings lately.. it's like I just keep trying to find a new technique, and I haven't settled yet. I like experimenting, but I've been feeling drained lately. So i think it would be a good idea to get out there and get the opinions of other people.

    This is an image I just started on, I like trying out various colour schemes and I haven't settled yet with this one.. I wanted to focus on making a simple portrait and put in as much detail as I could this time around as i need a lot of practice with details. I feel like I have been getting nowhere though and i need help.. critiques would be highly appreciated

    Latest update:
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    Last edited by Pepperwheel; November 10th, 2009 at 04:42 AM.

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    Update. Chipping away at it slowly ^^
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    hmm.. a bit more work done..
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    baslack is offline Registered User Level 1 Gladiator: Andabatae
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    Name:  faceshot.jpg
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    One thing pops out immediately to me looking at this and that is problems with the brow. There's too much space from eye to eyebrow and there's no sense of bone in the brow above the eye. If you look at these references I've attached, you'll note the area above the eye where the zygomatic bone connects to the frontal bone of the skull. This ledge is actually what the eyelids tuck up under. In fact in many expressions, the mass of tissue on this ridge comes down and obscures the top of the eye lid. Grab a mirror and lower your brows to see what I mean. The eyebrows themselves at rest ride right along the high point of this bony crest. Also, note that the transition from the nasal to the frontal bone of the skull is more gradual and rounded. It doesn't have the sharp lines and angles that your image describes.

    Aside from that anatomical detail, I find the image appealing. Compositionally, I think you should decide on a few details to break the symmetry. Maybe a difference in jewelry side to side, or hair direction or perhaps a beauty mark. I don't think such would detract from the composition, instead it would accent the symmetry of the piece, by contrasting it. Hope that helps.

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    i think it looks good, the brow isnt that far off, although Baslack is right, different cultures have different facial structure. also some people have a slightly higher brow, and considering she looks asian, i think it works. maybe she has drawn on eyebrows? some women do that. the lace collar is gonna be awesome, love to see the jewelry and detail to come.

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    Pepperwheel is offline Registered User Level 3 Gladiator: Catervarii
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    baslack, W.Rowland - Thank you both ^^ I have been trying to figure out what was wrong with her brow so that really helped

    Hopefully it looks better now. However, i am no longer happy with her face >_<
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    danlambert is offline Registered abUser
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    Her face is very sensitively painted, beautiful job on her nose and lips in particular.
    She does seem a little dead behind the eyes though, honestly I don't know how you would go about changing this apart from trial and error so it's not the most useful comment. Other than that I would suggest finishing the hair and costume a little more taking into account the symmetry comment, I always find it's difficult to really see a face clearly until it's put in a more finished context.
    Keep pushing it


    Oh, maybe just try playing about with the placement of features on a flattened version for a while, might help you figure out why you are unhappy withe the face.

    Hope that helps

    Peace
    Dan

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    SaintAsh's Avatar
    SaintAsh is offline Registered User Level 4 Gladiator: Meridiani
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    She probably looks so dead behind the eyes at this point because of the lack of highlights, which were present in the previous versions. I think the nose and lips are beautifully rendered, but the chin looks a scotch lopsided.

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    I'm feeling that her eyebrows are a little lopsided in the new version. If you're going for symmetry I think it would be good to have the face the same on both sides. (I'm not sure if the slightly different brow was intentional?)
    The right (her left brow) is on a really sharp angle as opposed to the gentle curve of the left. Also, there's more of a highlight on the right. Kind of throws it off balance.

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    Pepperwheel's Avatar
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    danlambert, SaintAsh, Ayem - Thank you all for your crits I left it alone for a while but i've returned to it ^^ The lopsided brow was intentional, but it doesn't seem to be working as well as I'd hoped so I'm scrapping that. I've decided to make the subject a bit darker and hopefully more interesting.. Comments and crits appreciated
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    I did a bit of work on her robe:
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    the second wip pic is the best one in my opinion.
    This is my Sketchbook, check it out!
    Lucid Dreams Studio http://www.luciddreams.se

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    Pepperwheel, I'll be honest and say I prefer the third image you've showed - the one with a rounder face and yellow eyes. I think it's more appealing than the other version. It had a more sinister vibe. But overall, you're great with shading.

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    Lotet, Lura - I see what you're both saying but honestly, I prefer her latest face. In my previous wip. I feel that her old face was too generic and plain. I actually really hate her old face >_< I'll try merging back some of her old features and eye colour later tonight and see what happens ^^
    Last edited by Pepperwheel; November 5th, 2009 at 03:22 PM.

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    I'm currently at school and I don't have my tablet or original files on me so I decided to just do a test edit on the small-res image for fun. I will work on it when I get home tonight:
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    OK, I've rounded out her face again and I'm trying out something different with the eyes...

    >_<

    they're just not vivid enough, and I'm not sure if the gold eyes will help since her entire face is quite warm... perhaps switching the colors would help (i.e. blue tattoos, gold eyes)? please help
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    baslack is offline Registered User Level 1 Gladiator: Andabatae
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    Yikes! That got scary. If you're going for kind of unearthly with those eyes its working. Interesting idea going with the all black sclera. Odd thing about that though, if you go too black like you have here, it makes it look like the pupils are two marbles suspended in empty eye sockets, which is the impression I have at the moment and what's creeping me out. You need some speculars/reflections on the black part of the orbs to let us know there's not just a hole there.

    By the way, think this has progressed quite nicely since the first time I commented on it. As for the old face and the new, remember that peoples readings on these are very subjective. I look back at #3 and I don't see sinister. I see kind of child like. I like the new face with it's more angular lines. It's a different type of appeal, but it's still appealing IMO. The real question is what mood are you trying to evoke?

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    Pepperwheel's Avatar
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    Thanks baslack I want her to look disturbingly beautiful. I see what you mean about the black area in her eyes, i'll fix that ^^

    update ^^ I tried giving her some jewelry.. I've also reworked her face..
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    Hey pepperwheel. Firstly let me say this is a wonderful image. I love everything about it, the clothes, neckpiece, her lips nose etc. However, and this is just my opinion of course, I really liked her hairstyle in the earlier WIP's. The blunt bangs looked really funky, and made her look a bit more "harsh" which i think suited the image. The side bangs are pretty and more fashionable, but I think it unbalances the composition a little. But of course you wouldn't want it to be too symetrical, so it's up to you really! (of course.)

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    Hi pepperwheel.
    I'm no expert, but I really like it.
    Especially those with the bloody lips and... the first one

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    baslack is offline Registered User Level 1 Gladiator: Andabatae
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    Maybe the neck jewelry/lacing is a little on the heavy side? I'd say open that pattern up to show more of the skin. Also, make sure that it follows the contour of her neck. Specifically at the top of the lace is very horizontal. I'm expecting more of a curve down because of the mass of her throat. The eyes look better, though I think the extreme contrast is still pushing those pupils forward. Maybe a bit more massaging of that bit.

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